


Recovery

by ToxicLaughter



Category: Until Dawn (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, IDK why but I like these two, M/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Recovery, also I'm evil, but also happiness, has been updated to explicit for smut, idk - Freeform, lots of filler, so expect climbing class sadness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-18
Updated: 2016-06-20
Packaged: 2018-04-21 07:22:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 13
Words: 18,906
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4820387
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ToxicLaughter/pseuds/ToxicLaughter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The interviews are over, the caskets of two close friends have been lowered, and the physical scars are healing. But the emotional ones are carved deep into the mind of the six survivors; canyons of decay and betrayal that may never close.<br/>Chris, tormented by the memories of what Josh had done to them, of the sight of that old man’s head being sliced off, no longer sleeps. Nights are riddled with terrors of Josh dying, or of him coming back to life and finishing them all off. Days bring fear and anxiety, images of those monsters clouding his vision.<br/>It all becomes too much and one night he’s in the bathroom, holding his parent’s gun, when Mike calls. The other survivor, who had lost just as much as he, asks to take Chris out for breakfast.<br/>Suicide will just have to be put off for later.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know why I like these two, but near the end of the game where it's really just these two guys left they were kinda cute and I ship them now, so yeah. But I still love Climbing Class with a freaking huge ass passion. 'Cuz, let's be honest, Joshy-boy is just a giant cinnamon roll who deserved a better ending.

Watching Josh’s casket get lowered into the ground next to the gravestones of his sisters was hard enough without Josh’s parents coming over and crying to Chris about how they had never thought he was that upset about Hannah and Beth, and how sorry they were that he put them through that and that he killed Jessica. The six of them, the ones who had made it off that God forsaken mountain alive, had made a pact to not tell anyone the truth. They’d blame Josh for their trauma, for Jess, for even Josh himself. They’d claim that Josh killed Jess then turned around and offed himself.

That was the worst. Listening to the Washington’s cry about how upset they were with their son and knowing that everything they had been told was a lie. Josh was his best friend, he should have had his back. He should have been there after Josh’s sisters died, he should have kept his friend from going insane. But he didn’t. The only person who had truly helped Josh was Sam and even she couldn’t keep the kid from going off the deep end. 

He drove home alone, barely even glancing at Ashley. He couldn’t bring himself to date her, or touch her, or even look at her. When they were sitting in the helicopter, flying down the mountain, she had been the first one to tell the officers that Josh was crazy and he had tried to kill them all. She had cried and cried after that, hugging Chris and soaking his jacket with her tears. When they finished the interviews he had told her that he couldn’t bear to be with her, not with all the memories that it brought. She believed him.  
In actuality he couldn’t bear to be with someone so stupid. Josh was his best friend. Josh was…Josh was his first love. The one person he felt calm and natural around. And there she was, tearing the kid down when he couldn’t even defend himself. 

By the time he got home his own parents were in the kitchen, asking in sweet, kind voices if he needed someone to talk to. He said no and went back up to his room. He didn’t spend much time out of it these days. 

Chris’ dad had done a few things for him once he got back from Blackwood Mountain, one of them was buy him a car. Chris had talked about how he wanted to visit the Washington’s on a regular basis, as well as the graves of his friends. His parents figured it be easier on them if Chris just had his own car. The other thing he had done was put Chris’ computer in his room, taking up what little space he had left up there.

He sat down at his desk, turning the machine on and taking off his suit jacket and shoes. The old man who had saved his life hadn’t said much about the Wendigo’s hunting them on the mountain, but he did mention how you could possibly kill them. Chris wanted to know exactly how to kill them, how to lure them into a trap, how to eradicate them from that mountain. For Josh.

The research had led him to about three specific sites. One was Ghosts of the Prairie. It talked about the fear the legend of the Wendigo put in the residents of Northern Minnesota. ‘ _So thin it could not be seen from the side_ ’ one line read. He tried to imagine the grayish humanoid being that had hunted them on that mountain. He remembered how undernourished they had looked, rib cages almost sharp enough to tear through their ghastly skin. Another website he found was Gods and Monsters; that one talked about how anyone, no matter how desperately they needed to survive, could become a Wendigo just by resorting to cannibalism. The last website he had come across was ParaResearchers, which he quoted saying that the Wendigo looked like a creature made completely of ice. He could completely attest that that quote was wrong. If they had been made of glass they would’ve shattered the first time he loaded a shell into it.

But there was one thing all of these websites had in common: they all stated that the Wendigo territory was in the north. Blackwood Mountain was in Canada, cold and desolate, with very few people nearby, prime squatting ground for the creatures, and the best location for someone to go from normal, to cannibal. 

That night on his computer wasn’t much different from any other night on his computer. He googled some more about the monsters, coming across nothing new, wrote some notes about the creatures in a Word Document he had been using to record any thoughts or facts he had, then he sat back and watched some porn. The website he had found that he liked the most worked sort of like Netflix. It cued up a video that it thought he may like, and played it automatically. From straight porn, to fetish porn, to even gay porn, Chris just sat back and watched. He didn’t touch himself or imagine that he was one of the guys (or girls) in the videos. He just watched. Watched them fake moan and swing their legs over a couch with high heels on (because yeah, wearing high heels while having sex made a lot of sense).

They were so overplayed and ridiculous, but they kept his mind off of what he had heard about Josh’s death. One of those monsters had grabbed his head and just squeezed. Mike had seen the whole thing. He had apologized profusely to Chris once they got back. “I’m sorry I didn’t do anything! I’m so sorry! I was right there, but - fuck! I was so scared.” He had whimpered out tears for a while after that and Chris had told him that it was okay. He understood. He had been scared too. 

When he chose to save Ashley over Josh that first time, even though it all ended up being a prank, he had been scared in the moment. Josh was his best friend, but Ashley was so pure and had so much life ahead of her. When he found out later that it was all fake and he hadn’t caused Josh to die, he had been infuriated. He thought Josh loved him just as much as he did, he thought the feelings he had were being requited. He had been wrong, but that didn’t mean Josh deserved to die.

His phone buzzed on his bed and he turned around to silence it. It was Ash again. She wanted to know if he was doing alright, after all, both Jess’ and Josh’s funerals were on the same day, it had been emotional. He texted her back a short ‘I’m fine’ and when she asked him if he was sure he was fine, he told her to spend her time worrying about someone else, Mike or Sam. Ashley stopped texting him after that.

Once he managed to stomach some weird kinky ‘facial abuse’ porn, he decided that it was time to shut his computer down and get some sleep. The day had come and gone too quickly, starting with Chris wandering around a tux rental place, moving onto him hugging Matt and Emily at the same time (part of him gagging at the idea that Emily was acting so devastated at Jessica’s death, despite how she treated the other girl), and was ending with him in the bathroom.

Sleep was for the non-traumatized, not borderline psychotic. So, not Chris anymore. He held his father’s gun that he had bought when they moved into their newest house, claiming that it was for home security. It was two a.m., Sam had tried to call him two hours ago and Ash had texted him about four hours ago. He hadn’t heard anything from the other three. Mike had been pretty quiet during the service, Matt had hung behind Emily the whole time, and Em had done nothing but wail about how miserable life was going to be without two of her “like, super close friends, ya know?”.  
***********  
A long time ago he had read on the internet that guys tend to commit suicide in a more messy way than women. Women think about the people who have to clean up after them, men don’t. He didn’t think that was all true. As he sat there, revolver in hand, he felt bad for his mother. She’d be the one to come into the bathroom first, and she’d be so upset. He figured that even months after he was gone she’d probably still go into the bathroom and try to wash the phantom blood away.

Guns were supposed to make them all feel safe. Safe from all dangers that lurk outside their home. Guns didn’t make them safe. They could never be safe. No one was safe as long as those things still lived, no matter how far from society they were. His paranoias crept up and he imagined the Wendigo that killed Josh climbed into his room and peeled his skin off as he slept, ignoring his screams and slurping up his muscles and veins like they were top notch Italian food.  
That death was more gruesome and painful than a bullet to the head. 

Swiping his phone open, Chris put on some music. He wasn’t sure what the song was, he didn’t particularly care. He turned the volume up as high as it could go. The notes reverberated off the tile and drywall, the pale yellow wall a perfect canvas for his insides. His parents would be up soon, the music too loud and the bathroom too close that they couldn’t possibly sleep through it. “I’m sorry…”

Flashbacks of when he had put the gun to his head when Josh had made him chose between himself and Ashley filled his thoughts. He had been ready to die then, ready to give up his life for the girl he thought he loved just as much as he loved Josh. And now, he was ready to die. 

“ _You hit me like a fire, shot me like a bullet. Burned me up and down, no way to cool it._ ” He stopped, bring the gun down the counter and grabbing his phone. That was definitely not one of the songs he had downloaded. Picking up the device, he was surprised to see that Mike was calling. When had the other man’s ringtone been set to that? He checked the time before he answered. Thirty-seven after. 

“Mike?”

“Hey, I can’t sleep.”

“Me either. What’s up?” This was strange. He had never really though he had Mike were particularly close, especially before everything that happened on the mountain. Sure, they had worked together near the end, and Mike had been the one there when Chris had completely lost it against Josh, betrayal too overwhelming. But they weren’t close. They had never been close.

Mike sighed right into the receiver of his cell, nearly blowing out Chris’ ear drums. “Normally I call Jess…or Em…but uh, you know, I-I can’t. Not anymore. Emily’d rather burn her furry boots than talk to me.”

“I think they’re called UGGs.”

“What?”

“The furry boots, I think they’re called UGGs.”

“Oh. Um, do you want to have some breakfast?”

Chris shut the light off in the bathroom and exited, taking a peak into his parent’s bedroom. They had only stirred. He carried the gun back into his room and hid it under his mattress, he’d have to slip it back into its case tomorrow when he had the chance. He closed his room door and turned on his bedside lamp. “It’s almost three in the morning.”

“Dude, Denny’s. C’mon, I’m just…upset man. I was having a hard time today at the…uh…funerals.” He coughed, probably to hide the fact that he was crying, and continued. “I just, need to talk to someone who was there. You know? Matt and Em hate me because they’re fucking crazy, I don’t know, Sam is too busy with her college shit, and Ash only talks about you when I’m with her.”

“So you need someone to talk about you?”

Mike fake laughed. “Don’t be a dick. I need someone to tell me I’m not losing my mind. Plus, I’ll pay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think! My other fic for Until Dawn doesn't have as many pre-written chapters as this one, so this will probably be updated more often. So expect a chapter every other day.  
> ALSO, these are the websites that I found on Wendigos that are mentioned in the story as Chris uses them:  
> Ghosts of the Prairie: http://www.prairieghosts.com/wendigo.html  
> Gods and Monsters: http://www.gods-and-monsters.com/wendigo-legend.html  
> ParaResearchers: http://www.pararesearchers.org/index.php?/20080731306/Folklore-Mythology/The-Wendigo.html
> 
> ANNDDDD the song I referenced for Chris' ringtone for Mike (excuse my head canon about Mike listening to country music): Sunshine and Whisky by Frankie Ballard


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all soooooo soooooo much for all the lovely comments you left on the first chapter. I was so grateful in fact I decided to post another chapter earlier than I had planned. And to Ina, I did look up the scene you told me to and payed more attention to Chris and OMG YOU WERE SO RIGHT. All of the feels came tumbling down I got really sad. So thank you, yet curse you.

He decided to not to enter the restaurant until Mike showed up. Surprisingly, the man took a lot longer than the five minutes he said it would take through his text. He leaned up against the building, fiddling with the zipper of his new jacket. The police hadn’t let him keep any of the clothes he had worn or taken up to the mountain, especially not his jacket. It had been covered in blood by the time they picked him up, some of it the fake pig’s blood Josh had used to fake his death, some of it the old man’s blood, and some his own. He missed that jacket, and the one his parents bought him was uncomfortable and smelt like the store. His old one had his own musk seeped into every fiber, some of Ashley’s scent too, and Josh’s.

The car door slamming near him made him jump. He tugged his jacket around his torso and stood up straight, trying to play it off. Mike smiled at him as he hopped up onto the curb. “A little jumpy are we?” His smile grew wider when Chris tried to deny it and ended up just stumbling over his words. “Come on, me’s wants some blueberry pancakes.” He said, rubbing his hands together.

They sat in the middle of the restaurant, across from the counter, and were waited on by an elderly woman. She didn’t seem too happy about having to wait on them, but took their orders anyways. Mike got his blueberry pancakes and Chris got a chocolate shake. “Ice cream? At three in the morning?”

“Pancakes? At three in the morning.”

“Okay, okay, I rest my case. I just figured the one thing Denny’s doesn’t screw up is breakfast foods. Plus, I did say that I would buy you breakfast, not dessert.”

Chris gave him a dirty look. “What if ice cream is what I always have for breakfast?”

Mike smiled, his eyes crinkling. Chris stares at him, fascinated. “Well if that’s the case, then you might just be my soul mate.”

Mike’s plate and Chris’ glass are set down as Chris processes that sentence. He doesn’t read too much into it, but he finds the wording weird. He rolls the last two words around in his head. _Soul mate_. It may be because he should’ve been dead by then, not drinking chocolate ice cream out of a 50’s style glass, but he began wondering exactly how often people found those. Or even worse, how often people found their soul mates, and then one of them ended up dying. “How tragic.”

“What?”

“Huh? Nothing, sorry, I was just…thinking. How are your fingers?”

Mike sighed. “I wish I could say they have a dull pain reminding me that I need to avenge them, but they don’t. Honestly not having these fingers,” He lifts his hand and wiggles his phalanges. What’s left of his pinky and ring finger manage a sad sort of wiggle; it would be comical if the story behind their loss wasn’t so awful. “Doesn’t change anything.” He finally finishes his sentence. “The worst part is that sometimes I forget that they’re not there and I’ll do things like type for half an hour before realizing that I’m missing all of the letter in the last two columns on the left side of the keyboard. No As or Ss for me.”

Chris laughed and picked up his glass, finishing off the last bit of the milkshake. “Well, besides no longer being able to type ‘ass’, how are you Michael?”

He picked up another bite of his pancakes and chewed them slowly, setting down his fork in the process. “Pissed off, sad, scared. I just, I can’t…I want Jess back. Josh got what he fucking deserved, that bastard. But Jessica? She didn’t deserved to die, not the way she did.”

“Neither did Josh. Look, you can all hate him for as long as you want, but we’re the ones who caused him to be so fucked up. You were the main contributor to getting Hannah and Beth killed, you were the one that pulled the dick move that caused his sisters to run out in the middle of the woods and then probably get fucking eaten by those things! Josh was messed up because you assholes thought your prank was the funniest fucking thing in the world! His sisters were dead, he was upset, he wanted revenge, and yes, the way he went about it was fucking nuts, but we - _you people_ \- pushed him there. You killed his sisters and he wanted to kill you, reasonably so, but that doesn’t mean that he got what he deserved, no one deserves to die like he did.”

He slammed his hand down on the table and stood, pulling out his wallet and throwing a ten on the table, and quietly, but adamantly, left the restaurant. He was already in his car, keys in ignition, by the time Mike came jogging outside. He threw the car in reverse and he didn’t look as he backed up out of the parking space. “Man I’m sorry! You’re right!” Mike yelled, trying to get him to stop. He hesitated for a moment, glaring at his friend. “I was there man! You know that, you know that if I could’a done something I would’ve, but those things…”

Chris put his foot on the brake. “Yeah, we all did something stupid up there on that mountain, but that doesn’t mean you do and say stupid shit down here. Now get out of the way or I swear to god Mike I’ll run you over.” Mike did move out of the way, for a second. Then he was rounding the car and opening the passenger door open. “Dude!”

“Shut up. I’m the one leaving my car here.”

“This is like, kidnapping or something! Or, I don’t know, grand theft auto.”

“Really, Chris? Grand theft auto? Seriously dude, shut it and drive.”

“Where?”

Mike looked at him and his expression softened significantly. “I’d like to apologize to a good kid for saying shitty things about him.” 

Chris drove in the direction of the cemetery. Believe it or not, L.A. has a lot of cemeteries, and neither Chris nor Matt could remember which one they had been to the day before. “This is pretty sad, isn’t it?”

“I don’t think so. We were all pretty upset today, I know I’ve been driving in a daze ever since we got home. Plus, a little adventure would be nice.” Mike agreed, sitting back in his seat and loading up the next directions for the fourth cemetery on the list on his phone. “You know, I was gonna kill myself before you called.”

“What?” Mike seemed more attentive now, sitting up his seat, eyes wide, arms at his side and whole body on the defensive. “Chris? What the hell man?”

Chris started to cry, not wailing or sobbing, just letting the tears fall. He pulled off to the side of the road and rested his head on the steering wheel. His body shook quietly and he felt Mike’s hand on his back. “Just, losing Josh,” He mumbled out the words, careful not to say anything too incriminating. “And I haven’t slept a full night in a week – the nightmares are constant. I fear monsters in the closet man! Fuck!”

“Hey, hey, we all get those. Sam told me she can barely blink anymore. When she hears something go bump in the night she stays frozen – not out of fear, but because she thinks that it’s the Wendigo come to get her. I close my eyes at night and I see Jess getting tugged out of that door and dragged away through the snow.” Chris lifts his head and looks at Mike’s wobbly figure through his tears. “Chris, we survived that hell hole. We earned our spots on this planet, don’t give that up man. If you ever feel like cutting loose again, just call me up, I can be at your house in fifteen minutes.”

“What about –,” He sniffled and coughed. “You?”

“Me? Man, I’d never kill myself, that’d be a devastation to the whole female community.”

Laughing, Chris smacked Mike in the arm and started the car up again. “Whatever, liar.”

“No! Really! Ladies around the world would mourn.”

*********

They got to the right cemetery sometime around five in the morning. No grass has grown on either one of their graves. They see Jessica first. Her headstone has the words ‘Beloved by all, mourned by all’ on it. Chris thinks it poetic, but a poetic lie. Not many people liked Jessica. She could be a bitch at times and she had got the reputation of ‘queen twat’ in high school. She wasn’t as bad as some of the other girls (cough, Emily), but she wasn’t as nice as say, Sam. But those who did love her, would mourn her loss for a long time. She was a bright light in their circle of friends, and clearly very important to Matt.

On Josh’s headstone it just reads ‘Beloved son, brother, and friend’. The male version of his sister’s stones (daughter, sister, and friend). His stone is much bigger though, showing off his parent’s wealth. They may have thought that Josh’s final moments were him killing Jess and tormenting the others, but that sure didn’t change how much money they were willing to spend on all of his funeral arrangements. 

“I’m sorry Josh, I know that we were assholes to your sisters and you just needed to be an asshole right back to find closure. You didn’t deserve to go the way you did, you definitely don’t deserve to have your name slandered after death. Sorry.” Mike said his piece and left to go spend some time at Jessica’s grave, leaving Chris alone with Josh’s headstone.

“Wow, okay. This is really stupid. I didn’t say anything earlier because there were too many people around. I guess I have no excuse now. Except that you probably can’t hear me because you’re not even in this coffin and you’re super dead. But hey, I’ve seen some crazy shit this past month, so anything’s possible. Josh, buddy – _Josh_ – you did some stupid shit. But I still… I still love you bro. I love you and I hate that I can’t tell you that one more time. I was such a dick to you. After your sisters died I kinda dropped off your Earth and I’m sorry for that. Then up on the mountain I fuckin’, dammit, I just left you there in that shed to die! I hope that you can forgive me, wherever you are, if you can hear this, whatever.” Chris leaned down and rested his hand on Josh’s gravestone. He closed his eyes, and he forgot all the bad things Josh had done on that mountain and remembered the first time they met.

He didn’t hear or see him, but Mike came over and sat in silence with him, not saying a word until the sun rose.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys liked this, I had some issues with it at points. Chris coming out to say that he did try to kill himself was sort of like a heat of the moment thing...still not a hundred percent happy with the way I wrote it though.  
> So please, as always, leave your thoughts in the comments below, and hopefully I'll have the next chapter up sometime Sunday.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEY! So I'm really trying hard to keep up with this. So here's this shitty chapter...ugh, please don't hate me because I don't know how to continue stories. Speaking of which, if you want to see this story go in a certain direction, please tell me! I'm more than willing to hear suggestions.
> 
> ALSO, on a sadder note, I'd like to extend my condolences to anyone out there devastated by the loss of Daniel Kyre from Cyndago. My heart goes out to his friends and family and I hope that they can all get through this.

“Christopher, sweetheart, you need to get up.” The sound of his mother’s voice made him stir and roll around in his bed. He peeled his eyes open and looked up at the door. “It’s noon.” He sat up, rubbing his hair to try and get it out of his face, and grabbed his glasses. His mom moved to leave the room, but stopped for a moment and turned back towards her son. “Also, Michael would like to know where you want to go for lunch, he said, ‘no ice cream’. I don’t know what that means, but I assume you do.”

She left him with that, closing his door so he could get dressed. Chris rolled out of bed, confused at why Mike was at his house. He tried to remember what happened after the cemetery, but he was too tired at the time. He thought maybe he drove Mike back to the Denny’s and they went their separate ways, but maybe he didn’t. Maybe he brought them both back here. He didn’t think too hard about it as he dressed, slipping on a pair of socks and house shoes to head down stairs.

Michael was standing in the kitchen, bags under his eyes and a cup of coffee in his hand. “Thanks for letting me crash here last night, even if you didn’t know about it.” He said to Chris’ mom. Well, that answered that question. “Honestly, won’t happen without your permission again.” He smiled one of those Mike smiles and Chris’ mother just giggled and told him he was welcome in their home anytime, unannounced or otherwise. Then she went on to try and say that Chris needed friends, especially since he lost Josh.

Chris made sure that she didn’t get into too much detail and knocked on the wall outside the kitchen. His mother looked over at him and grinned, dismissing herself from the room. Nodding to him with both his head and his coffee cup, Mike said, “Good morning, Christopher.”

“Hey, man, what’re you? What’re you doing? Here. I mean. What are you doing here?”

“I figured you owed me one, for breakfast and all.”

Chris snickered. “So you want me to buy you lunch?”

“Yes sir. Now, pull up your big-boy britches and let’s hit the road, I’ll drive.” He dumped out the rest of his coffee in the sink and set the cup down on the counter. He was already out the door and opening up his car door by the time Chris got his second shoe one, stumbling out past his mother.

She held the door open, one eyebrow raised. “What’s going on?” She asked, looking outside to see Mike laughing into his hand as he watched Chris stumble out the door.  
“I don’t know, mom, um, we’re going out for lunch I guess. Call you when I’m on my way home.”

“Okay, be careful!” She called out after him, watching as her son stumbled down their front steps and smacked Michael on the arm for laughing at him. They both got into Mike’s classic Mustang. Chris wasn’t good with cars, but he could tell that this particular car wasn’t very cheap. It was old, but well taken care of. He wondered if it was Mike’s dad’s.   
They didn’t talk about where they wanted to go, Mike just drove until he saw a place that looked good enough to stop at, and pulled over. It was a burger joint, which Chris inwardly groaned at, and Mike licked his chops like a feral beast. They sat at the front of the restaurant this time, Chris requesting a seat by a window. “So, besides getting even, why’d you ask me out?”

“I guess I just have a thing for blondes.” Mike laughed and Chris sighed.

“Ha, ha, it’s dirty blond jackass.”

“Oh, even better.” This time, he winked. 

Chris just glared, not appreciating the obvious flirting. But, it couldn’t hurt to play along. “Michael, not in front of the children!” He fanned his face with his hand and acted like he was blushing three shades darker than he actually was. They joked around like that until their waitress came and took their orders, Mike settling for a bacon cheeseburger (“Wow, heart disease much?”) and Chris got a plate of chicken tenders (“No bacon?”).

They finished sometime around one thirty, Chris rubbing his stomach, surprised that he had finished all the food on his plate, and Mike picking at his fries. The check came and Chris got his wallet out, tipping way too much, but not willing to wait for the girl to run back and get the correct change. “Ready?” He asked, not waiting for an answer to stand and grab his phone.

Wiping his mouth, Mike stood after him, slipping his own cell into his pocket. “Yeah, yeah, text your mom you’re gonna come play games and shit at my house.”

“Why?”

“Because I want you to come play games and shit at my house.” Mike gave him a ‘duh, dumbass’ look and exited the restaurant. 

“Okay, that’s all cotton candy and roses there Casanova, but why should I want to come over to play games. And shit.” He added the last part as an afterthought, but soon realized that the phrase really rolled off the tongue. Mike got into his car, waiting for Chris to get in so he could throw it in gear and pull out of the parking lot.

“Because Chris…you’re the only one…who hangs out with me anymore.” He looked down at his lap, not bothering to take the opening for him to pull into oncoming traffic. “The nightmares and the memories are hard enough without having to add the fact that all of my friends dropped off the face of the planet too.”

Oh. Chris didn’t say anything, he just pulled out his phone and sent a quick message to his parents to let them know that he didn’t know when he’d be home, and to not wait up for him if he was really late. His mom sent him back a ‘stay safe’ and he didn’t hear from her again that day. “Okay, fine, you convinced me,” Chris said, attempting to lighten the mood. “I’ll come over and participate in this ‘games and shit’ you speak of, but only as long as Mortal Kombat is involved.”

Mike laughed. “Dude, when is Mortal Kombat not involved?”

***********

“You make me sick. Literally. Physically and emotionally sick.” Chris ran his fingers along the spines of the video game cases in Mike’s room. “Madden? 2000-2015? Need For Speed? Trucking Simulator!? Dude! These are not video games!”

Mike chuckled and leaned over Chris’ shoulder, reading the labels on all of his games. “What are you talking about? They’re classics man. I mean, come on, who doesn’t love to play a little Madden 2-k-15?”

Finger making an obscenely large swoop, Chris pointed to himself. Mike rolled his eyes and snatched Mortal Kombat off the shelf. He put the disc in his PlayStation, tossing one of the controllers over to Chris. “Just so you know, I’m gonna whoop your ass.”

“Please, you couldn’t if you – what are you doing?”

Chris looked down to the floor where he had made room for him to sit down. Mike stared at him from his perch atop the bed, his brows furrowed. “Um, sitting?”  
“No. Man, sit next to me. Bed’s ten times more comfortable than the floor.” He scooted over so they both shared an equal viewing scape of the screen. “I get Johnny Cage by the way, no exceptions.”

And get Johnny Cage he did. And with Johnny Cage he managed to kill Chris’ assortment of characters (including J. Cage’s wife and daughter) each and every time they squared off, Mike always using the ‘here’s Johnny’ fatality on Chris. Two hours in, death toll higher than the Sears Tower, Chris finally gave up. He dropped the controller on the bed and demanded they do something else. Mike teased him, saying that he was a sore loser, but shut the game off anyways. “Okay, then Negative Nancy, what do you want to do?”

“We could –,” He has to stop himself. Because the words that follow ‘we could’ are never ‘play football’, ‘go outside’, ‘watch movies’, etc. He had said the words that follow we could to Josh on multiple occasions, only getting what he suggested on the last two. We could make out. He scratches his brow and lets out a breathy laugh to himself. No, no, no. “We could…watch Netflix and chill?”

Shrugging, Mike agreed, using the controller to pull up the Netflix app on the PlayStation. He started an episode of Friends and scooted back on the bed to lean up against the wall. Chris followed in suit. They got through five episodes and three debates about which couple was better by the time Mike asked Chris to spend the night. He called his parents, ignoring Mike complaining about how Rachel and Ross were terrible together and clearly Rachel and Chandler were a better couple. Chris had to stop himself from gagging at the idea of Rachel – the fictional version of Emily – and Chandler – the fictional version of himself – sleeping together. He told his dad that he wouldn’t be coming home that night and that he’d be there in the morning to do anything they needed him to do. They were pretty lackadaisical about it. 

Ever since he had gotten back from the Washington lodge they had pretty much let him do whatever he wanted. He figured they were just so glad that they still had their son after what he had been through that they wanted to make sure that he could live his life before something even worse happened and he actually did die. 

Hanging up, he tossed his phone to the side and turned to Mike. “First of all, ew, Rachel. Second of all, I honestly think Chandler is gay.”

“Gay? Does he just have a, uh quality?”

Chris’ lip curled up into a grin and he nodded. “Definitely has that quality.”

They get through a couple more episodes before Chris falls asleep against the wall, his head lolling off to the side. Mike watches him with a steady sense of curiosity. Chris will twitch in his sleep, frown, then mumble someone’s name (more often than not it was Josh’s). He heard a few things for Ashley about Chris never sounding like he used to, like he was always tired. He wondered what she meant, but when he saw him that morning Mike had finally seen all the dark bags under Chris’ eyes. Even then, as he watched the other man sleep, he was certain that at some point he’d wake. 

Moving so they could both lie down on the bed instead of leaning against the wall, Mike pulled Chris down to his side, letting the other turn to face the wall and cuddle up against the cold surface. He, himself, faced the ceiling, not bothering to grab a blanket and cover his feet. Netflix had long paused their stream, asking if they were still around to watch. Mike didn’t think it necessary to mess with until morning.

His eyes started to droop and he was drifting off when Chris launched up in bed. If he hadn’t been so tired he might of reacted, but instead, he just lay there, waiting for the other man to go back to sleep. 

Chris looks down at him, his heart pounding. His gaze moves to the wall, then to the TV screen, the back to Mike. Chris moves down to line his and Mike’s hips up, then scoots closer to Mike’s side, his arms tucked into his chest and his head lying just the side of Mike’s shoulder. Peeling an eye open, the brunette stares down at the blond.   
Well, this is unexpected.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave a comment below on how crappy this chapter was, I know, I know. It's bad. Sigh. The next chapter will be up Wednesday or Thursday. Depending....  
> -.-   
> And if you get my Friends reference - love you.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is! Sorry it took so long, it's been a long week. This isn't very good...tbh, but I don't have a beta, yet! I did just employ one of my friends to be one for me, so hopefully future chapters aren't as shitty.

Much to his chagrin, Chris doesn’t get home until noon the next day. His parents are both off to work and his mother leaves him a not in the kitchen saying that there were leftovers from last night’s dinner that he could have for lunch. So he heats up the spaghetti his mother made and turns on the TV. 

The news has become one of his favorite ‘shows’ since he got back. After the Washington twins died he had gone into a complete media blackout, not wanting to hear any of the crap the newscasters were saying about the two sisters. But after what he had gone through he had made sure to catch every segment about it, phone in hand, mind set on calling in to set the facts straight. 

Nothing about Josh that day. 

Sam calls him later, asking him if he's okay, having heard about how much he and Mike had been hanging out. "Yeah, I'm fine." _Fine in that crying in the corner, suffering alone, kind of way_. "Why?" 

"Just wondering. Mike said you looked...tired." 

"We all look tired." He wasn't sure if any of them had gotten a full night's sleep since they got back. If it was hard for him he couldn't imagine what it would be like for Mike who had lost someone who had loved him. To know that he hadn't been there in her last moment, telling her that he loved her, must be hard to think about. 

Sam is sympathetic, too much so, and when Chris asks her if she's okay she just says that she's getting through this with the help of her family. He hangs up on her, barely murmuring out a farewell. 

He goes back up to his room at some point and gets on his computer, pulling up the word document he has on Wendigos and starts reading over his facts. He then checks his social media. Believe it or not ever since he got back from the lodge he had become obscenely popular on the internet. He had over a hundred thousand followers on Twitter. Which he hated. Why were so many people interested in his misery? 

There's a link addressed to him titled: _Unsolved Mysteries: The Deaths of Blackwood Mountain_. The caption from the sender basically says that he should look at this and that they're touching on some of the 'stranger' things the survivors had said in their interviews. The webpage pulls up and he's not surprised to see pictures of Sam, Emily, and Mike. They had been 'camera material' according to the lady who had photographed them. They had used the same pictures in the newspaper too. 

He is surprised to see a picture of what looks like an old, old, drawing. It's of the Wendigo. Flashbacks of the old man hit him and he falls off his chair. There's a panic that sets in, and suddenly he's hyperventilating and having his nightmares in the daytime. He has to reach up from the floor and grab his monitor, pulling down off of it's perch and slamming it on the desk face down. 

Part of him knows that he's broken something, but the other part needs to get to the bathroom so he can puke. It lasts five minutes until he's just dry heaving, wanting to close his eyes, but unable to. The visions get worse the more he thinks about them, he know this, but he also knows that he'll never forget. Maybe he should just delete his social media...   
It's a drowning sensation, the feeling he gets, and it crushes his chest and his eyes and his stomach. He lays on the cool tile floor, contemplating getting up to call someone over.

Maybe Ashley would be willing to come over and cook for him. She made really good tacos. 

He knows that he should see a therapist, probably more than his parents are already making him, but he also knows that any therapist he talks to is just going to write him off as a crazy. They had done the same to Matt when talked about all he had seen down in the mines. "Monsters? Derived from cannibalistic humans? You need to be honest with me." 

That's what they would say. No one would believe him. Only certain crazy sections of the internet did, and since a psychologist's specialty is to lessen the crazy, he doubts any one of them would believe him. 

So he lays there until his mom gets home. She opens the door and asks him if he's hungry. He shakes his head and rolls over onto his side, scrunching up his nose at the dirt and grime underneath the bottom lip of his vanity. He really should clean more. His dad comes in later with a glass of water and reaches up around Chris to pull his son's toothbrush and paste out, hinting that Chris probably smelled like bile. 

At some point his parents must think he's asleep because the ice has melted and he hasn't moved in a while, so they shut off the bathroom light and go to bed themselves. He turns back over to face the ceiling and wonders why he's so pathetic. Hands go to his eyes and he tries to rub away the tiredness he feels. 

Sitting up he grabs the water and swishes it around in mouth, spitting it out into the toilet and shaking his head. Gross. 

When he gets back to his room he fixes his monitor, glad to see there aren't any breaks in the screen, and closes out of his social media. His phone has a good number of notifications, mostly Sam and Ashley asking him if he was alright or telling him not to click the link. One from Ashley even read 'fucking asshole people, they don't know what we're going through, if I find out who posted that to you I'll push them off a bridge'. He's glad to see that she at least cares about him. In a homicidal kind of way. 

No messages from Mike. He's not sure whether to be relieved or disappointed. Part of his is glad that Mike hasn't tried to contact him because he wouldn't want Mike to think of him as being too weak to take care of his own shit. Sure he had told the other man about his attempt and attempting suicide, but had any of the survivors from that mountain really never think about it. He wasn't the only one, right? 

The other part of him is upset because dammit Michael Munroe, Chris thought you had a real thing going and maybe Chris could be your Cochise and maybe Mike could be Chris' bro. Or maybe he's just overreacting. 

Yeah, that's probably it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tell me what you think! I was thinking the next chapter could be from Sam's POV and about what she thinks is going on with all of her survivor friends. We shall see. Until next time fellow shippers!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, So I'm back after a really long break. I hope most of you stayed. I do apologize for the REALLY shitty quality of this chapter, I was really just trying to get something out.

The nightmares aren't the worst part. It's waking up from them and knowing that in twelve hours she'll have to go through them all over again. Sam, once a grumpy and devilish riser, has become an early and alert riser. A heart attack every morning can do that to you. She makes her bed and heads downstairs, not bother with the television and going straight for the toaster. She makes some wheat toast with peanut butter spread across the top, and takes a seat at the table. No one else in the house wakes up for quite a bit longer. 

Her mom wishes her a farewell and slips out the door, heels clanking and coffee already staining her magenta blouse. Sam doesn't say anything. Her father rolls out of bed a couple of hours later while Sam is laying on the couch, letting some HGTV show play as the background to her life, and he throws on a jacket to go outside and converse with their neighbors. 

Sam thinks he leaves at some point because it's been an hour and no one can hold a conversation with their neighbors for _that_ long. It had been a while since she had last talked to any of the others in person and she figures that it's been long enough. Her car is cozy and warm, her shoes are soft and comfy, and the ride is slow and methodical. 

She arrives at Michael's house unannounced and knocks on the door lightly. He answers in jeans and what looks like a very old t-shirt. He lights up at the sight of her and barely manages to keep himself from jumping on her and settles fur just a hug instead. "Sam! Oh am I glad to see you! Come in!" His smile is contagious. Mike leads her to the living room where a rerun of Friends is playing. He laughs at himself and closes out of Netflix before she can see the girls win the football game. "Heh, just trying to find some evidence to prove a point." 

She just nods and lets him shut the TV off so they can sit in silence. He's awkward talking at first, which she finds strange, but he soon warms up to her and suddenly they're talking about 'that one time in eighth grade when Chris got stuck at the top of the rope climb and Josh had to climb all the way up there and rescue him'. Sam giggled. "And remember when he rang the bell when he was up there!" She said. 

Mike snorted and nodded. "Yeah! Chris wouldn't stop screaming at him after that! I don't think they spoke to each other for at least five minutes. That was one for the history books!" They delve into more memories, some about Hannah and Beth, others about Jessica, and a few about Emily and Matt. 

Sam would like to think that every snort and chuckle from Mike's mouth is an anthem of happiness, but she knows that it's nowhere near that. It's a mask, covering the sorrow of the remnants of his life. She knows that he's had a hard time dealing with Jessica's loss and from what Chris had told her, he had been having trouble sleeping. Part of that was because of the many nightmares the group now shared, and the other part had to with his chronic loneliness. No one from school talked to him anymore and he had refused to go to college, vouching to just stay at home and work online. 

Of course this hadn't fixed any of the problems, it just made them worse. "Mike?" She said, waiting for his laughter to die out before she spoke again. "How are you?"   
He explodes. He goes from cheerful to bitter in less than a second. "Why does everyone care how I am? Can't we just fucking have fun, Jesus." He stands and she stands with him. She knows that Mike's been lonely, but she also knew that he had been spending time with Chris. Not that that really helped, Chris had become a regular downer after everything on the mountain. Of course no one could blame him. 

"Mike, I just want to make sure that you're okay." It's a stupid statement and she knows this as soon as it leaves her mouth. 

"Okay? Of course I'm not okay Sam," She reaches out to give him some solace, but he rips his arm away before their skin can even touch. "You're not okay, Em's not okay, Matt, Ashley, Chris - none of us are okay! We're all fucking broken and not even our friends care anymore. We should've died on that mountain but some screwed up twist of fate kept us here and you know what? I wish we all would've died on that mountain. I wish that Jess would've been by my side when we took our last breath and I wish that Josh was still around so I could skin him for what he did!" 

Mike's fists are clenched and Sam's taken multiple steps back. He's got a predatory look on his face and he doesn't back down until Sam starts telling him that it's fine, he doesn't need to fight anymore. 

She promises not to tell anyone that he cried, and leaves. 

She writes the visit down as unsuccessful and drives for a while around town. Ashley's house is next and when she gets there the redhead is pale with a rosy nose. She sniffles and let's Sam in. Ashley explains that she must've gotten sick at the funerals and that she doesn't plan on letting Sam stay very long, lest she get the other girl sick. 

Ash seems to be doing the best out of all of them, her only complaint that Chris no longer wants to even look at her. She whines for a while about how much she misses the nerd and how much she wants him to just 'get over himself'. "Chris has found friendship in Mike, and he seems to be doing a lot better, isn't that enough?" She tries to hide that fact that she thinks that Ashley is acting like a brat, but after a while she just lets it all out. 

"No, I mean. Yes, it makes me happy that he's happy, but I just wish that he was happy with me." 

"Look, Ashley, as much as it would gratify me to sit here all day and listen to you complain, I really do have something better to be doing, I'm not sure what, but I think I could find something." And with that, she leaves, ignoring Ashley's distant questioning and climbing in her car. She calls Chris. 

"Okay, I get it! I'm sorry I ever helped Josh push you towards that _woman_! God, she's insufferable sometimes! I'm coming over by the way so make your body ready." 

"I'm sorry, what?" 

"Chris, it's Sam; I'm coming over, we'll talk more when I get there."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading, my other UD fic should update sometimes this coming week.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, chapter six! I hope y'all like. Expect the next one in about a week or so.

_During Chris' senior year in high school he went to the final Halloween to be thrown by the Washington children. Although he was great friends with Josh, over the last couple of months he had become better friends with Beth - and somewhat good friends with Hannah._

_His backpack weighs down his shoulders, but he ignores the weight of his two textbooks and throws his bag into the back of Beth's Bentley. He's not surprised that she owns such a nice expensive car (the Washington parents would buy anything for their children), but he is surprised by the sight of the twins' older brother. Josh and he had been together forever - or for as long as ever could be in a child's time._

_"Yo! Cochise, what's up?" Josh scoots over so the shorter of the two can sit behind Hannah in the passenger's seat. "How's life man, we haven't talked in a minute bro," Chris smiles at his friend, buckling into the leather seat._

_"Pretty good man, how's life as a graduate?" Although they had met in third grade it was very clear from the beginning that Josh was way smarter than the rest of them. He was a bit older than them too, but even for the kids in his age group he had been smart. Come freshman year in high school he had been taking calculus, three AP classes, and was asked if he wanted to skip ahead a grade. Josh had originally said no, preaching that he couldn't leave 'his Cochise' behind, but after some convincing from Chris he had agreed and skipped over 10th grade._

_Chris had only wanted the best for his friend, to hell with his own feelings. Even though he couldn't see Josh in class the other boy had made a point to meet up everyday for lunch. And once Josh got his license he had refused to not to drive Chris home everyday. He would be lying if he didn't say that Josh Washington had stolen every piece of him - including his heart._

_As cheesy as it sounded, every time Chris looked at Josh he felt his stomach drop and his face heat up. He wondered for a long time if Josh felt the same way. It would be a while before he got an answer._

_They drive with Taylor Swift playing on the radio, all of the Washingtons (and although he won't admit it, mostly Josh) singing along, and Chris texting Ashley. "Dude! Really? Just do her already!"_

_"Gross man!" He yelled over the music. "She's like, my - my little sister dude!"_

_"Lies! You totally want to take her to the bonezone!" Chris scrunches up his nose. Ashley was really hot, and kind, and whatever. But she was nothing compared to Josh. Or even Sam._

_"She's not the one I want to take there," He mumbles._

_"What?"_

_He shakes his head. "Nothing, the chorus is coming up." And Josh waits for Taylor to get to the chorus then sings along right with her all the way up to their driveway._

_The Washington house is twice as big as their winter lodge, which, when Chris had first come over, Chris hadn't thought possible. But it was. And it was huge._

_Josh slept in the basement ("College is useless Cochise, I'm just gonna live life ya know?"), which he dubbed 'the party floor', and the twins slept upstairs. Chris helped Hannah decorate the basement while Beth and Josh convinced their parents to give them a large sum of cash to get food and drinks._

_They came back an hour later to a fully decked out basement with speakers, streamers, and tables to hold all the goodies they had bought. "Nice Han," Beth said, setting the paper bags in her arms down on the closest table to her. "Very nice. Sam just called, they're on their way. They should be here in like thirty minutes."_

_"Did Mike say he'd come?" Her voice is full of hope and Chris can see that her sister hears it too._

_Beth's face goes soft and she shrugs. "I think so, he and Em said they were going to come." The mention of Mike's girlfriend causes Hannah to lose that hope and stare at the ground._

_"Oh Hannah! Don't worry about boys, they're terrible, trust me." Josh said, moving to wrap his hand around his sister. "They're gross, smelly, and look at me! We can barely dress ourselves. You'd be much better off as a lesbian!"_

_"Joshua!" Beth scolded with a smile. "Don't listen to him Han, girls are just as bad."_

_Chris laughed. "Oh, I don't know about that. Last time I checked Josh hasn't taken a shower since last week."_

_"Ew. Really?"_

_"Yup, natural scent my fine furry friends."_

_"Gross Josh, really, ew. Go like wipe down your pits before everyone shows up."_

_"Only if Chris helps me." He winks over at the blonde who just rolls his eyes and motions for Josh to walk up the stairs. They sound like a herd of elephants as they stomp their way to the main floor, then up one more flight of stairs to the biggest bathroom in the house. Chris refuses to go inside with Josh, despite the Washington's whining, and waits outside the door._

_When the doorbell rings he's the first one downstairs (or upstairs in the twins' case) and the first one at the door. Beth stands behind him, her lower lip stuck out and her arms crossed. "When did you become a resident Christopher?"_

_"I don't know, sometime around third grade - Matt! Good to see you man!" He let the jock inside and wasn't all that surprised to see Mike, Emily, and Jessica behind him._

_The three newcomers headed downstairs where the girls greeted them by turning on the stereo. "Josh, you coming man?" He asked, standing at the top of the basement stairs._

_"Yeah, just, one sec." Josh left for the kitchen. Chris stood still for just a moment, then headed downstairs._

_The party is a documented success. Hannah takes thousands of pictures (mostly of Mike from afar), Jess and Em video some of it and put it on social media, and when Sam gets there she takes a group pictures to use as her banner on Facebook. Josh comes down sometimes during the big swing of the party, laughing like he normally does and making dumb jokes._

_When everyone leaves Chris finds himself sitting on Josh's bed, waiting for the other to get him a sleeping bag. He refused to let Josh sleep on the floor and insisted on taking the floor himself (despite the fact that the bed was big enough for at least five people). Josh threw the bag on the floor and grabbed a bunch of pillows once he got back in the room. "Still don't understand why you can't jus' sleep with me Cochise."_

_"Josh, I don't know how you did it man, but I think you're drunk." The older of the two smiles and shakes his head. He lay down on the floor, slipping into the sleeping bag and tucking one of the pillows underneath his head. "And I'm not sleeping with you. I've heard horror stories from the girls at school."_

_Josh laughs and climbs into his bed, sitting on the mattress and staring down at his friend. "I promise I won't take advantage of your virgin innocence!" He says dramatically. "Unless you want me to." Chris throws an extra pillow at him. "Okay, okay, fine - but don't come crawling to my side when it get's cold as shit at night."_

_"I promise I won't be doing that bro."_

_They snort at the same time. "You'll be eating those words."_


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello friends and fans, welcome to chapter seven! Whoo hoo. I'll be honest I have no idea when this story is going to end. It might be ten chapters it might be fifty, I have no idea. But, do expect another chapter by AT MOST 12/10. I just recently got a job so I have no clue what my schedule will be like with school and all that good stuff. So yeah. Continue to be patient with me ^_^

Half of his Kraft Mac and Cheese was sitting in the kitchen sink, wasting away. It made him sad. Mostly because he was really hungry and he totally could've finished the whole bowl, but also because he felt a little connected to the noodles rotting away in their porcelain prison. While he wasn't a noodle and his prison wasn't porcelain, they still shared a lot in common. Both hardening at the elements, wishing that someone would just throw them into the garbage disposal to rid them of the pain of living. 

Sam was maybe complaining, he wasn't listening (too occupied with the crusting Mac and Cheese), but she seemed really angry about something. At some point he must've said something that she liked because she calmed down and asked him if he was thirsty. "Yes, water please?" She nodded and headed into his kitchen to get them something to drink. Both of his parents were out for the day and Sam coming over was actually keeping him from calling Mike. Which was good. He had to remind himself on an hourly basis that the whole incident at the lodge could've been avoided if Mike wasn't such an ass. 

Hannah didn't deserve the humiliation delt upon her in her last moments. And neither of the twins deserved to go the way they did. Such an ass. 

Sam set the drinks down on the coffee table and turned on the television. She started an old-old episode of Friends airing on VH1. He felt his stomach drop. Shit. "So, what've you been up to?" Conversations between them had been easier than conversations between the others. He didn't blame her as much. 

"I hung out with Mike and Ash. Now you. Otherwise-" He thinks about letting his lips flap as much around her as they do around Mike, but second guesses himself. "Normal. You?" 

"Just the shit with Ash. I did talk to Mike though. And Emily seems to be manhandling Matt into leaving her so I guess we can all wait at the sidelines for that to happen." He nods. He figured that most relationships within the group would fail. They were too close now. They had seen too much of each other. 

They fall into light conversation about who they think would be the one to break it off, settling on the idea that it would most likely be Matt to do so (unless Emily figured out that he wanted to break it off, because then she'd jump on the opportunity to have the last laugh). Mike comes up in the discussion and Sam asks Chris if he thinks that the other man is okay. "I don't know, he seems fine. Just lonely." 

"We're all lonely. Hell, this week is the most I've seen you guys. I'm just so busy all the time." He hums in agreement. Although he wasn't in college Chris often found himself occupied with other more important things than friends. Like Wendigo research. "Are you having more bad days than good?" 

She's the only one that knows. He wasn't sure why they all confided in Sam, maybe it was because she was easy to talk to and she wouldn't gossip, but they did. She knew that Chris was undergoing just as much therapy as the rest of them, but was also taking a lot more pills. He told her not long after they got back from the mountain that he had good days and bad days. And when his days were bad, they were really bad. "Depends. Lately, yeah. Not sure why." He picked at his fingernails. 

"Is it because you've been around us more? Do we bring up bad memories?" Not you, he thinks, but Mike does. And Ashley. They bring up a pile of emotions that can't be pushed back down for quite some time. He wonders if maybe his friends are making everything worse. 

She finishes her drink and cleans her glass out, not that there's much to clean out, and he walks her out to her car. She presses her lips on his forehead and smiles. "Stay safe." 

"Okay mom," He says. She sticks her tongue out at him and he laughs, shutting her door on her so she could drive off. 

He went back inside and made himself another bowl of Mac and Cheese. 

******* 

He's asleep, bowl on the floor, mouth open, TV playing reruns of some stupid comedy show, when Mike bangs his fist on the door. Chris jolts upwards and grumbles, picking up the bowl and disposing of it in the sink. Mike knocks again. Chris yells at him to hold on for one goddamn second, and heads for the door. Mike looks like shit, that's his first impression. His second is that Mike is holding a Manila folder in his hands. "Dude, what?" He tries to smile but it's hard when he realizes that Michael has probably lost his mind. He lets the other man in. "What's wrong dude?" 

Without saying a word, Mike gives Chris the folder and goes to grab himself a glass of water and some Tylenol. Chris flips through the sheets of paper in the folder. It's all a bunch of gibberish to him. Police and hospital reports. He recognizes some of their names and realizes that Michael probably stole these from the police department. "What am I supposed to do with this?" 

"Flip to the back." He whispers. Chris does as he's told. The papers at the back of the file no longer have their names, but one single name. Josh's. He sighs. This isn't something he wants to see. He already knew about Josh's issues, hell he was the one calling Josh on a daily basis to make sure that he was taking his medication and if he was alright. "They were giving him the wrong medication." 

"What are you talking about? And how did you get this? I better not be harboring a fugitive." 

Mike laughs. "Nah, I had my dad pull some strings." Right, Mike's parents are all powerful now that the Washington's no longer rule the land. Chris snorts. "Just, listen man," He walks up to Chris and places his hands on the other's shoulders. "Josh was being given the wrong medicine. They diagnosed him with severe depression when all of his symptoms reflect someone with schizophrenia." 

"Josh was not a schizo." Chris says pointedly. He turns around to put Mike's back to his front door, then shoves the file back into Mike's hands. "And I honestly don't care about that, and neither should you. Now bugger off." 

Mike furrows his brows and scrunches his nose. "You should care, because this," He slaps the folder with his hand. "Could be proof that Josh wasn't at fault for his actions. We could liberate him!" 

Chris balled up his fist and punched Mike in the face. "Screw you! Seriously? Less than a week ago you were cursing him out for killing your little boobed toy," Shit, he shouldn't of said that. No backing out now. "And now you're all for clearing up his name! That's bullshit Michael and you know it!" 

Mike holds his cheek like the punch actually hurt. Chris wasn't very strong in the first place and he couldn't bring himself to hit Mike with all his force. So the punch was more like a slap than anything. Mike raked his eyes up and down Chris' frame. Chris bit his lip. "I was doing this for you." He says softly. "Because I know how much he meant to you." 

When he starts to cry he doesn’t try to stop it. They weren't as bostious about their intimate relationship as they were about their friendship, but most of their group could tell. Chris had loved Josh with his whole mind and body. Josh had betrayed him on that mountain and yet there he was, still trying to find a way to fix it. He's not blubbering. He's just standing there crying. His glasses get a small drop of salty tears when he puts his head down for a moment. Mike's just staring at him 

He's crying because he misses Josh and their friends. He misses Jessica and Hannah and Beth. He misses going to the Washington's house on a Saturday, when his parents want to have their friends over, and playing COD until Josh complained that he was losing too much. He misses the way Sam would wink at him when he stood too close to his best friend and then text him that she was going to die of old age before they kissed in public. He missed Josh cornering him after they hung out with Ashley, whispering into his ear that he _couldn't handle_ when she was all over _his_ Chris. 

But he's also crying because he's stupid. For hitting Mike, for thinking that any of them could ever be friends again, for trying to commit suicide. He's pissed. His fists go to his forehead and then he starts to sob, loudly. "I'm sorry." He says quietly. Mike wraps his arms around Chris' torso and holds him close. He lets Chris cry for a long while, just stroking his hair and at some point removing his glasses. They stand for a good thirty minutes. 

Chris grabs Mike's hand and walks him upstairs to his room. They spoon on the floor. Mike wraps his arms around Chris' waist and Chris thinks that maybe this means just as much to Mike as it does to him. "It'll be okay." Michael says after a while. They close their eyes. Mike continues to pet the tuft of blonde hair under his chin. "We'll be okay."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't forget to review!


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heh...heh...I'll get better at updating I swear.  
> 

When she gets home from work, she calls out for her son. Silence scares her. She had known for quite sometime that Chris had developed some sort of depression. She hadn't bothered to say anything. The online forums said that as long as he wasn't jittery or twitchy then there was nothing to worry about. But that didn't mean the silence haunted her. She called out for him again and bounded up the stairs to his room. The door was open. She let out a loud sigh of relief when she saw her son on the floor, curled into Michael Munroe. Then she gasped because her son was curled into Michael Munroe and they probably didn't mean for anyone to see this. 

She silently closed the door to his room and crept back downstairs to leave them alone. 

From about when Chris turned fourteen she had figured out about his sexuality. She wouldn't classify it as gay (considering he had that long period in his freshman year of high school where he pinned after that Ashley girl with every bit of his being) but it definitely wasn't straight. Straight boys don't make out with their best friends on the living room couch. Seeing Josh Washington on top of her son had been the first indicator that Chris wasn't normal. Mike had been the second. 

She closed her eyes and smiled. Chris had gone through some really tough times lately, and if she thought correctly, so had Mike. They deserved each other. Even if it was just platonic cuddling. Oh she hoped it wasn't. Losing Josh had taken such a toll on her son. The first real love of his life not only dying, but losing his sanity and psychologically torturing Chris. And poor Mike, who had lost such a young beautiful girl. They both needed someone in their lives who understood their pain and were willing to love them through the nightmares and bad decisions. 

Stirring could be heard from Chris' room and she opened her eyes. The door opened and she could hear Chris question with a groan why his bedroom door was now closed. Mike grumbled something behind him and leaned against the door frame. "My mom must be home," Chris said softly. "Go lay back down, I need to go talk to her." 

Mike just shrugged and went to lay on the bed this time instead of the floor. 

Chris rested his hand on the back of the chair his mom was sitting in. She looked up at him and smiled. "Hey, mom. Could you like, not tell everyone that Michael Munroe and I were cuddling on the floor at the mothers' brunch this Sunday?" 

She laughed. "Sure, just tell me - is this a thing now? Or is this just like a mutual bro thing? Like you hug and whatever and maybe make out or something, then he goes off to some girl's house while you sit at home and cry for a while." 

"Mom." 

"Well. Is it? Or do I need to go buy some more tissues?" 

"Mother." 

"I'm serious Chris." 

He crossed his arms. "You don't sound serious." Her smile widened. They stared at each other until he uncrossed his arms and put a hand on his forehead. "I don't know mom, probably the latter. Mike is a ladies' man, you know? He's not exactly gay material." He thinks for a moment. "Or bisexual material for that matter." 

"I don't know, I could be pansexual material. If you asked nicely." Chris raised his eyes to Michael, standing on the stairs. The other flashed a smile and waved at Chris' mom who had stood to relieve herself of the embarrassment of talking about a child behind his back. "I guess people are starting to talk huh?" He chuckled. "Something we should probably do as well?" 

Chris just nodded. He didn't spare a glance to his mother as he followed Mike back to his room and closed the door. It was only when the door was fully closed and the unlocked lock clicked that he realized the severity of this situation. This was Mike. Straight, classy, totally in love with women Mike. Mike that had dated both Emily and Jess. Had broken Hannah's heart. The same Mike that Josh has teased him about when the eldest Washington had first found out that he wasn't completely straight. The same Mike that he had had not one, not two, but five extremely detailed, wet dreams about. And they were about to discuss a relationship. Between them. 

Chris the nerd. Mike the most popular kid in school. 

Sam was going to love this. 

Emily would most likely kill Chris. 

Ashley would cry for a while. 

Matt would probably end up collecting ten bucks from all the others. Including Chris himself. 

Shit. 

"Are you okay?" Mike reached a hand out and rested it on the other's shoulder. "I mean, I can go yo, I can waltz right out that door, we can take a breather, then we can come back at a later date and I don’t know...talk about it then?" 

"Mike. Shut up. Please, for just like five seconds. I'm still trying to process this whole, 'you're not straight' thing." Mike laughed, but otherwise, he shut up. 

And they stood there, while Chris processed Mike not being straight, for only a few minutes. Then Chris reached up with his hands, placed them on either sides of Mike's face, got on his tippy toes, and carefully, scientifically, put their lips together. Twas but an experiment. And he enjoyed the results. 

Mike's hands stayed at his sides, not wanting to make an unwanted move. Chris reached down to grab his wrists and place the other's long fingers on his hip bones. Their lips parted, but their bodies didn't. "This is nice." Mike whispered. 

"Yeah. Let's talk some more." Mike tried to move, but Chris stopped him. "Here, talk here. Like this." 

"Okay." 

"Okay." Chris said, staring at the curvature of Mike's collar bone. Why was he so short again? Oh yeah, that's right, so Josh could be taller than him. "What is this?" 

"This is called hugging, you like it? It's quite nice." 

Chris punched Mike in the shoulder the best he could. "Assbag. I see this as more than just...this. This is...more than just this right?" 

"Honestly, Chris, bro, you're making zero sense right now. But, if you want my opinion on what _this_ is, I'd say that it's something we should try. And hide from our friends." Chris furrowed his brows. "Not that I'd be ashamed." He adds quickly. "Just. If this is just something that we're seeking because of recent events, and not because this is what should be happening, I don't want to have to explain to Sam why we were together, but then weren't." He tries. Chris nods. 

In certain aspects, he agrees. The last thing he needs is for all of their friends to either a) get excited, b) get angry, or c) get sad, and then for them to not be what they thought they were? He could agree that keeping it secret for a while until they were a hundred percent certain that this was...what they thought it was. 

At some point, Mike went home. He said his farewell to Chris and his mom, passed Chris' father on the way out the door, and fell into his car. He started the vehicle with his eyes closed and pulled out of the driveway with his mind on the blond upstairs. 

He figured he had to be honest with himself. So he talked. To himself. The entire drive home. 

"Okay, Michael. Let's have a discussion. Christopher, he's fragile. I mean, so are you," He took a left hand turn. "You both lost the people you love, because I mean, who didn't know that Josh and Chris were fucking? Except for maybe Ashley. And you already insulted the shit out of his ex earlier this week so he's probably still sore about that. But that doesn't mean you can't bring it back! I mean, Chris is a good guy, he should forgive you. Yeah. Plus, he might've insulted Jess, I can't remember. But let's just, get through this night. Just get a good night's sleep. You hear that brain? A full, at least five hours of sleep, preferably filled with some naked Chris?" He pressed on the brake when the light suddenly turned red. 

"I wonder what he looks like naked. Probably kinda chubby. I mean, it's Chris, he just, what, sits around on his computer all day? Then again, I'm not all abs of steel like Matt. Or crack-addict thin like Josh. Jess seemed to like it though." He smirk turned into a frown as he pulled forward towards the light. "No, shake that thought out. This is about you and Chris. Chris. Chris, the kid that you totally were in love with in eighth grade. The same kid who made you come out of the closet to yourself, so you could later come out to him. Then he started dating Josh, but that's besides the point. 

"God. I am so gone." He pulled into his neighborhood. "I am so very gone." He turned off his car's engine. "Fuck me in the asshole." He turned the engine back on, pulled out of his driveway, and headed back in the way he came. 

When he saw Chris' house he parked by the sidewalk, stalked up the front steps, didn't bother to knock, and burst through the front door. Chris' parents jumped but he quickly stilled them with an apology and a hastily shouted 'I need to speak with your son' before he skipped up the steps. He threw the door open to Chris' room and before the other boy could say anything he slammed the door shut. 

"Bro, I think I love you." 

"Bro. I think you just broke my door."


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heh, sorry about the late update. I've been dealing with the holidays and school starting again and other bullshit.

_The first emotion he had felt was complete and utter humiliation. His mom squealed, then put her palms over her eyes, and then struggled to find the right words. Josh licked his lips. He stood up from where Chris was on the couch and helped the blond up behind him. It was the first day of sophomore year and Chris had brought Josh home to talk about a rather touchy subject. Five minutes into the conversation Josh had tackled him on the couch_

_Five minutes into their sloppy make-out session Chris’ mom had walked through the door. The first thing she did was shriek, the second things she did was clap, and then cried, and then ran over to awkwardly hug the boys. “Oh I knew it!” She exclaimed, then told them to go back to what they were doing, she’d lock herself in her room so they wouldn’t be bothered._

_Josh smiled as Chris’ mom slid into her room. “I’m glad she’s okay with it.”_

_“Yeah, same. Considering that I haven’t even come out yet.” Chris muttered, twiddling with his fingers._

_Josh grabbed his hands. “Don’t worry about it. She seemed ecstatic.” He smiled. It was infectious and before he knew it Chris was on his back again letting Josh press his lips to Chris’ face and neck. “I bet your dad will feel the same. Han and Beth already know –,”_

_“How?”_

_“I tell them everything bro. Like – everything.”_

_“Everything?”_

_“Everything bro. I’m already cataloging this moment in my head so I can recount it to them later.”_

_“Traitor.” Chris mumbled. “I don’t have anyone to talk to.”_

_Josh rolled off to the side and pulled Chris into his chest. He hummed in thought. Chris couldn’t very well tell Ashley, she’d be heartbroken and confused. Matt was out of the question, he had made it clear on multiple occasions that his relationship with both Josh and Chris was a rocky one. The girls might be a choice. No, they’d be so focused on the fact that they had finally come out to talk with Chris about the actual physical moment. “Talk to Mike about it.”_

_Chris pulled back. “I was just joking.”_

_“Oh, well my suggestion still stands.”_

_Chris nearly lost it. He could help the snort he let lose, but did manage to stifle most of his laughter. “Michael Munroe would probably kick my ass if he figured out that I was…doing this. He’s never come right out as a homophobe, but the way he treats some of the kids at our school – it wouldn’t surprise me.”_

_“Christopher,” Josh said, feigning the sound his mother makes when she’s appalled with him. “I never took you for intolerant.” Chris sighed. “Seriously dude, you think Mike’s gonna judge you? That guy’s been wanting to get into_ my _pants ever since middle school. It wouldn’t surprise me if he was trying to get into yours too.”_

_Placing his head in his hands, Chris groaned. “All this talk about Mike is making me not want to kiss you.”_

_“Really? Let’s test that theory out.”_

_Josh threaded his fingers into Chris’ short hair and rubbed gentle circles through it. Chris mewled and let Josh pull him into his lap. They broke for air and chuckled. “Guess I was wrong.”_

_“Guess so.” Josh said, staring at Chris. His eyes suddenly went wide and he looked excited for something. “Oh hey! Now that I remember! I need you to do my physics homework.”_

_“I think you mean – ‘I need your help with my physics homework.’”_

_“Nah, man, I need you to_ do _my physics homework.”_

_Three months after they had come out to Chris’ parents (the Washington’s would have to wait a little while longer) they had been outed to Sam who had just yelped in joy (much like Chris’ own mother had) and told them how happy she was for them. Lunch had been awkward with Sam staring at the two of them, waiting for them to make some sort of romantic move at one another, but as more and more of their group trickled in for conversation she gave up and engaged in talk with the twins._

_Mike had stared at the two of them much like Sam had and it gave Josh the feeling that he possibly knew about them. But when he finally opened his mouth to ask Chris for some help with his math homework, he let it go. “Why is everyone trying to get me to do their homework for them?”_

_“Because you, Sam, and Emily are the smartest in the group and Sam has refused to help anyone but Hannah, and Emily’s too busy with her student counsel thing to even talk to us.” Jessica said, looking to Mike. “But you know Michael, I have a B in math 2.”_

_“Yeah, thanks, but no thanks Jess. Chris has an A in Calculus and I’m in math 3.” He smiled at her. “But really, thanks.”_

_Chris watched the exchange with fascination and looked to Josh, who shrugged and gave him a ‘stay out of this one’ look. “So, um, just meet me in the library after school. Okay? You too Josh, I can help both of you at the same time. Two birds,” He picked up his trash and tossed it into the bin. “One stone.”_

_Sam sniggered. “Chris you should start charging people the way they’re all over you.” The shorter blonde shot the two brunettes a knowing look, then looked back to Chris._

_“No, I should be referring them to you Miss I-took-calc-my-freshman-year.”_

_“Ah yes, clearly they need a tutor if they’re stupid enough to try and get help from you.” She smiled as his face contorted into a look of disappointment then a small smirk he tried, but failed, to hide. “Any who, good luck with them, I have bigger problems to deal with.” She gestured to the girls of the group who were huddled as a trio. Ashley looked lost while Em and Jess looked like they were about to scratch some eyes out._

_Chris cringed. “I should be the one wishing you good luck.”_

_“Please, I can handle myself.”_

_“Well, I don’t envy you, that’s for sure.”_

_Josh stood and headed for the door, Mike close behind. “You comin’ or what bro?”_

_“Excuse me, the Chris Signal is in the sky, Gotham needs me.”_

_She snorted again, this time, letting it evolve into a laugh as the three boys disappeared out the door._

_Chris followed them both to Mike’s class first where they, in detail, discussed their plans for after school and Mike reluctantly left to go sit down at his desk. Josh placed his hand on the small of Chris’ back to lead him to the science hallway. The halls were empty, lunch only minutes from getting let out._

_Josh had never been shy about PDA but Chris had made it adamantly clear that he had made it two years without getting his ass kicked and he didn’t want to ruin that streak. Although that never stopped Josh from backing him into the dark corner next to his biology class._

_Slender fingers wrapped around his belt loops and his waist collided with Josh’s. The taller boy leaned down to mouth on Chris’ neck. The blonde placed his hands on Josh’s  
shoulder. “Bro.” He said as a warning. _

_“Mike is crashing our study date Cochise,” Josh whined. “I was gonna do X-Rated things to you.”_

_“In the library?”_

_“What better place to see if we can keep it quiet.” He laughed when Chris’ nose scrunched up at the thought of their old lady librarian finding them fucking in the foreign novel section. “Oh well, I’ll just come by later tonight and suffocate you on your couch.”_

_“Romantic.” Wiggling out of his boyfriend’s hold, Chris slipped into his class. A few moments later when his phone buzzed he sighed and tapped the screen to see what Josh had said (Josh was the only person who ever texted him during school hours)._

_**Don’t lie. You’re totally into the choking thing. Your masochism fuels my sadism baby. Which is why we’re so perfect. See you tonight, don’t forget those pink fuzzy handcuffs. - J** _

_Chris frowned – despite the corner of his mouth curling upwards in a grin._

_**You’re the one who likes their hair pulled. - C**  
_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The babes come back next chapter. I just had to get some climbing class out of my system. Expect some PG-13 stuff...I'm not sure about smut yet because I've never posted any that I've written and I personally don't think any of it's good. But hey, if someone wants to beta for me specifically for those scenes that'd be totally boss.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Little late, but hey, it's here! Kind of a weird chapter. We'll see what happens though. I have some plans for maybe a few more chapters. There'll be a little closer for the babes and then maybe some nice little cutie-kissy stuff.

Once he could identify the look of sorrow on the other man’s face Chris jumped up from his computer chair and put his hands out in a non-threatening pose. “Sorry, probably shouldn’t have opened with that.”

“You think?” Mike said, his expression morphing into one of sad humor. When silence settled over the room, Mike rubbed the back of his neck. “A, uh, conformation or rejection would be nice. Hell, confess your undying love or your undying need to murder me right now.”

Chris shook his head and put his hands on his ears. “Yeah, of course.” He patted his hands on his pant legs. “Um, sit down for a second.” He gestured to his bed and Mike did as he was told. Chris sat down next to him, a few inches away. “So you love me?” Mike nodded, fiddling with his fingers. “That’s pretty intense. No one’s said that to me since,” He smiled. The thought of what life was like just three years ago made him both excited and utterly depressed at the same time. 

They sat on Chris’ blue plaid sheets, Mike staring down into his lap, Chris forward at his computer screen. He watched the static text, letting his eyes focus and un-focus on the letters. It was quiet and Chris was just glad that his parents weren’t going to barge in. His mom had probably been planning on him and Mike having alone time since the first day that Mike came over. “Why do you love me?” It was a valid question. He needed to know. He had asked Josh when he had told him and he didn’t say it back until Josh gave him lawful reasons.

He could feel Mike look up at him, but he didn’t look over at him. “I’m not sure yet.” He said. “Ever since that first night – or morning – I couldn’t stop thinking about you. I wanted to impress you, I wanted to make you like me. Everything I said I thought through, everything I did I second guessed. It was like I was courting Jessica again.” He reached up and set a hand on Chris’ shoulder. “I don’t know why I think I love you, but I think I do.”

Reaching up, Chris set his hand on Mike’s. “Okay, I think I can accept that.” Mike smiled as their eyes met. “But I don’t think I love you back. Not yet. I think I’m getting there though.”

“Oh.” Mike said, not looking away. “I can deal with that right now.” He reached up, pushing Chris’ hand away to place his own on Chris’ cheek and ear. “Can I kiss you at least?”

“If you try hard enough.”

Mike laughed and leaned forward. Their lips barely touched when Mike stopped and looked up into Chris’ eyes. He was surprised to see that they were closed. Mike took the final plunge, keeping his lips closed and massaging them over the blonde’s. The kiss lasted for a few blissful seconds before the taller of the two pulled away, hands still resting on Chris’ face. “How was that?”

“There was an obvious lack of tongue, but I’ll forgive it.”

“Didn’t realize there was a need for tongue.”

Chris chortled. “I may have been smarter than Josh, but I did learn one thing from him – there’s always a need for tongue.” Mike shrugged and leaned forward again, this time using tongue.

By the time he got Chris to lean back against his pillows they were out of breath to the point that they both had to pull away to take a deep breath. Mike rested his forehead against Chris’ shoulder and took another breath. “This is nice, isn’t it?” He could feel the other man nod.

“Life hasn’t been this nice since before the lodge.”

“Amen to that.” He took a chance and reached out with both of his arms. He wrapped them around Chris’ torso and waist. His face rested on a soft chest and he tightened his arms. Chris placed his own arms on Mike. “It’ll be weird if your mom walk in.”

“She’s seen worse.”

“Aw, gross man – didn’t need to know that.”

“Whatever, you’ll learn to love my lack of decorum.” Mike laughed, vibrating both of their bodies. Chris scooted down in the bed and over so that he was laying completely on the bed and Mike was lying next to him. Mike grabbed the blanket and threw it over the both of them. “See, I already got you in my bed.”

Pushing himself up to hover over the blonde, Mike quirked an eyebrow. “How long do you think it’ll take you to get my clothes off?”

“My record is fifteen seconds.” Mike felt Chris’ fingers wrap around the bottom hem of his shirt. “And as much as I’d like to beat that record, there is one thing that my mother has not seen me doing and this having sex. So, how about we make a schedule, set a date, maybe make an appointment with my secretary.”

Mike’s lips curled into a smile. “He’s got jokes now?”

“I’ve always had jokes. I’m a freaking joke ninja.” Mike sat down to his knees, placing them on either side of Chris’ hips. “What’re you doing?”

“My legs are tired. Contrary to popular belief I don’t work out. My thighs are like twigs made of jelly.”

“Is that so?”

Mike nodded. “It very is so.” He leaned back on Chris’ knees. “And look at the time, nearly five past my-bed-time-o’clock.”

Chris sat up. “So you’re leaving?”

“Unfortunately I have work in the morning.” He stood up from the bed and stretched his arms out over his head. “But I will be back tomorrow to discuss this issue further. I hope your secretary is ready because I may just schedule your whole year up. But in the meantime,” He leaned down to be nose to nose with Chris. “Try not to get too sad about my departure.” 

Chris stretched up and grabbed Mike’s neck. He slammed their lips together and pulled away before either of them could get too into it. “Please, I’ve got bigger problems.” It’s meant to be a light hearted joke, but Mike absorbs it in another way. He gives a soft smile and leans away. “Don’t worry about saying anything to my parents, they’ve probably been listening in this whole time.” Mike raised a brow. “We’re a close family.” Chris said. “Probably.”

“Okay, well on that unadulterated note, I’m going home, I’ll call you tomorrow.”

“Definitely. Oh, and Mike, I’m sorry I can’t answer you right now.”

Mike shook his head. “It’s fine. Don’t worry about it. This is a lot to soak in, for both of us.”

“Yeah, it is.”

“Totally.”

“This is awkward now.”

Laughing, Mike headed for the door. “Yup, I’m gonna leave. Talk to you tomorrow bro,” He waved his farewell over his head as he left Chris’ room. “Kinda maybe love ya’!”

“Haven’t figured out if I love ya!”

“And I kinda maybe love ya for that,” He whispered, heading down the stairs to the front door. “Kinda probably.” He headed out to his car for the second time that night, not looking back to Chris’ house. “Most likely.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't forget to review faithful readers!


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woohoo! It's on time! I'm so proud of myself. This is kind of a filler/fluff chapter. So expect a little bit of plot. I'll be wrapping this story up in a few more chapters, the goal is no more than fifteen.

“Definitely.”

Sam raised a brow and tossed another M&M into her mouth. She used her tongue to melt the candy shell in her mouth, the chocolate spilling over her taste buds. “I haven’t heard you this sure since Josh.” Chris reached into the bowl between them and nodded.

“That’s because I haven’t _been_ this sure since Josh. I mean, it’s stupid Sam, but this guy has been around me since third grade and I think I’ve loved him this whole time.” He, unlike Sam, was a bit more brutish while eating the candy. He dumped it into his mouth and bit down on all of them at once. Samantha cringed. “Don’t get wrong,” he said through a full mouth. “I love Josh, always will. But Mike? He’s something different. Something saner and more tangible. Josh was an adventurer, someone I could never predict and someone who would make me see these new and amazing things. Mike on the other hand…well despite his douchey past, I know that he’ll never hurt me. He’ll always be there, he’s predictable and safe.”

“Isn’t that a bad thing?”

Chris shrugged. “Depends on how you look at it. High school me would say, yeah, that’s pretty bad. Boring as hell too. But this me?” He gestured down his chest and back up. “This me is terrified. This me is longing for a stable environment, for crazy mythical shit to become a thing of the past. _This me_ wants predictable and safe.”

He felt a hand stretch across the table. Sam laced their fingers together in a platonic ‘I completely understand’ sort of way. “I think you two can find that in each other.” 

“God I hope so. Because I swear, if I _ever_ have to run away from a beast in the woods again, I’ll jump off the nearest skyscraper. Really. I’m serious. Why are you laughing?” The other blonde lifted a hand to her mouth to stifle her laughs.

She shook her head. “Nothing, nothing, it just sounds so crazy now.” Sam leaned back in her chair and kicked her feet out. Chris took the hint and moved so she could rest her ankles on his knees. “I mean, can you imagine what a third party would think? Probably that we’re all a bunch morons.”

“Bitchy morons. And hot ones. Really a mix,” he picked up another handful of chocolates. “Like M&Ms. A delicious mix of deliciousness.”

“You used the same adjective twice.”

“It had to be done – it was the only way to stress the deliciousness of our mixture.” Sam began to think that the conversation was in fact taking a turn towards food and pulled the bowl away from Chris before he took the last bit of the candies. “Have you talked to Mike lately? About us, like you’re doing with me now?”

Sam looked solemn and shook her head. “Unfortunately no, but trust me, as soon as I seem him I’m repeating this whole conversation word. For. Word.”

“Oh really?” 

“Really. I think he deserves to know that his boyfriend is _totally_ in love with him.” She drug out the ‘o’ in love to make it sound a bit more childish. 

Chris frowned at her. “We’re not officially dating.” Not that he would mind becoming ‘official’, whatever that meant. He had Josh had never actually sat down and laid out rule and regulations of their relationship. Nor had they discussed if they were exclusive or if they had titles – they just happened to repel most others (more Chris than Josh) so they never found someone else to be with. Until now. Shit. Could this be a break in the trust he had created with Josh? 

No, because Josh had broken his trust at the mountain. Crap, now he wanted to throw something. Or cry. Probably cry. 

He needed to sit down and talk to Mike. For at least an hour – if not two. The ‘official-ness’ of their relationship was a messy topic at the moment and he’d like to clean it up. They had pretty much confessed to each other the night before…but word was cheap. 

The physical stuff though. That was fucking golden. “You good Chris?” He hadn’t realized that his gaze had fallen to his lap. Sam reached out a hand and set it on his elbow. “Maybe I should go. You can…call Michael.”

“Yeah. Yeah, see ya.”

“Bye, good luck.” She stood and placed her lips softly on his forehead. “Call me with the deets.”

He smiled. “You know I will.”

____________________________________________________

Chris lifted his hand and licked the white cream that was running down to his wrist. Mike raised a brow when Chris hummed with content. A smile lifted the edges of Chris’ lips and he looked over at Mike. “What? It’s the middle of the day. I can have ice cream in the middle of the day.” Mike rolled his eyes. The last time they were here, sitting at this table, Chris was still contemplating the meaning of his existence. This time, he knew what it was. It was the man sitting across from him. He looked over his hand and winked.

Mike visibly grew darker in color. “But I can’t have pancakes?” He gestured to his plate. Chris had practically _forced_ him to order a cheeseburger and fries (not that he really minded), and had made it clear that pancakes in the afternoon – and at three in the morning – were a no go. 

Setting down his milkshake, which was practically overfilling onto the table, Chris reached over and grabbed a fry, dunking it in the ice cream. Mike cringed. He had half a mind to tell Chris that what he was doing was disgusting, but managed to keep his thoughts to himself. Instead, he waited until both of their mouths were unoccupied. “So, what’s this all about?”

Chris nodded for some reason and licked the rest of the ice cream off of his fingers. “We need to talk. Like truly talk.”

“Okay.”

“I think it’s pretty clear that we’re both,” he moved his hands around. “Into this. So is this like a thing?”

Mike shrugged. “Sure.”

“Sure?”

“I’m not good at these kinds of things.”

“Me either. Wanna just make out?”

“Here?”

Chris shrugged. “I don’t know. I just really hate these types of conversations. I mean feelings, blah, blah, blah, emotions. Blech. It’s all chick flick stuff.”

“Totally.” Mike pulled his plate away when Chris went in for another bite. The sappy look on the blond’s face made him sigh and he passed over a fry. Chris grinned. Mike stretched out his legs and toed at Chris’ pant leg. The other raised a brow. “I’m flirting.” He said with a lopsided smirk. Chris rolled his eyes and spooned some ice cream into his mouth. “Wanna play some games after this?”

“Oh boy, I hope they’re reindeer games.” Mike kicked him in the shin. “Ow, dick.”

“Maybe later babe,”

Chris’ smile grew to an open mouthed grin. “Oh boy, I got upgraded to ‘babe’ status.” Glowering, Mike snarled at him to shut it – in a polite way of course – and kicked his feet up onto Chris’ lap. “God, why are your legs so long?” Chris moved Mike’s feet around on his lap until they were in a position comfortable for the both of them. 

“Well I have to be the taller one.”

“Why?”

“Well, so you can fit in my arms of course.” Chris pretended to gag, which made Mike laugh.

They ate the rest of their meal – or dessert in Chris’ case – in lapses of silence and jokes. Mike offered to pay, but Chris ended up throwing cash down instead. They left with Mike’s hand at the base of Chris’ back and the hostess giving them a knowing look. Mike leaned down to Chris’ ear. “I think Denny’s is like our, date night place.” Chris chortled. 

“So, you coming over or what?”

“To play video games?”

“Nah man, to make out.”

Chris shrugged. “Sure. But first I gotta call Sam, she’s my hype guy.” He looked up from his phone and thought for a moment. “And my wing man.”


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for the four month delay. This chapter was like slicing my own fingers off. I'm not good with smut, so....come at me scrublords I'm ripped.  
> Anywho, enjoy. There's attempted sexy stuff in here.

Padding around on the bed, Chris lay on the bed spread with a sigh. “God your bed is comfortable.” He dug his head backwards into the bed, humming in content. “I could stay here forever.” Mike chuckled from the doorway. On the ride over to Mike’s house, Chris had been on the phone with Sam, telling her that there was no need for her to break any heads, or to interrogate anyone any time soon. She had been so happy that her shrill voice could be heard by Mike in the driver’s seat. 

Mike closed his door behind him. He was expecting his parents to get home way later in the night, but just in case they did get home, he wanted to make sure that he and Chris had some privacy. Kicking his shoes off, Mike headed for the bed. But as soon as he dropped down on the cover, reaching out to grab Chris by his shirt, the other boy jumped up to his feet. Mike frowned. “Dude?”

“One sec.” Chris looked around, removing his jacket and tossing it on Mike’s desk chair. He bit his lip. “Just, don’t laugh okay?” Mike nodded, his smile turning into a straight line. Chris nodded too, taking one more nervous look around and then reaching for the overhead light.

They were basked in the dark yellow glow of the lamp on the bedside table. Chris pulled his arms through his sleeves and lifted his shirt off his head, exposing his torso to Mike. “Oh hell yeah.” He heard Mike whisper. Chris unbuttoned his pants and pulled them down off his legs.

Crawling back into the bed, he settled his lap on top of Mike’s. “This is…really hard.” Chris whispered. “I’m not used to…uh. Being this bold.”

Mike reached up and firmly grasped Chris’ hips. “Don’t worry. We don’t have to do anything tonight. Just, make out a little, and see where it goes from there.” The blond nodded. “Okay, here, let me get undressed too.” Chris leaned back to let Mike removed his shirt, then did the other man a favor and unbuttoned his jeans, pulling them off his hips and down his legs. Mike expertly kicked his legs out of his jeans. “Better?”

“Yeah.”

“Good.” Mike let his hands wander around Chris’ torso, stroking up the blond’s chest and over his shoulders. Chris wasn’t buff, not like Matt. He wasn’t thin like Josh. And he was defined like Mike. He had a body type Sam had eloquently put as ‘average’, and Josh put as ‘thin, with an extra pouch to keep all your cookies’ (then he patted Chris on the stomach with a grin, just before running away when Chris threatened his very existence). He felt himself recoiling in, trying to get Mike to get his hands off of him. He wasn’t hot like Jessica. He didn’t have the body of Emily. He wasn’t the perfect specimen that Michael Munroe was used to. “You’re so hot.”

Chris leaned back with a moan as soon as Mike’s lips latched onto his collarbone. Tightening his grip on the other’s shoulder, Chris pulled Mike down so that his back was on the bed and Mike loomed over him. “Hardly, but thanks.” Chris mumbled, leaning up to mouth over Mike’s pulse. 

Hands ran up and down sides, soft mewls escaping both boys. Mike broke away from their kissing and tilted his head down drag his tongue along Chris’ chest. Being the (super) non-virgin he was, Mike was more than willing to do all the work that night, to let Chris sit back and just enjoy himself. He’d get his pleasure later.

Slowly, Mike scooted down on his bed, level his eyes with Chris’ waist. He nibbled softly on the other’s hip bone. Chris arched up into the sensation, biting his lip as Mike’s rough fingers pulled down the waistband of his boxers. Attentively, Michael pulled Chris’ length free, watching the other’s facial expressions as he stroked up and down. The blond groaned softly, peaking down his form to stare into Mike’s eyes. 

Mike winked, then opened his mouth and stuck out his tongue. In one swift, majestic movement, Mike liked a stripe up Chris’ cock, stopping at the head to tilt his head down and engulf Chris. Whimpers of pleasure escaped Chris, one of his hands gripping the sheets to his side and the other snaking down to entwine his fingers in Mike’s dark hair. 

Hallowing out his cheeks, Mike lowered his mouth on Chris, tongue circling him the entire way down. He came back up for a moment and instantly went back down the shaft. 

Chris could barely handle it. He was groaning, loudly and lewdly, with each bob of Mike’s head. Fingers tightened in Mike’s hair with no regard for the strands that they were tugging out. Mike didn’t mind the tugging of his hair, Jess had done it a few times, but when Chris did it, he felt heat pool in his stomach. 

Placing his hands on either side of Chris’ hips, Mike took full control of the situation, not letting Chris buck up into his mouth. The restriction was torture for Chris, his whole body instinctively starting to rise to meet Mike’s mouth each time it attempted to leave him. 

Mike came up for air, licking his lips and grinning. “Best you ever had, am I right?”  
Chris chuckled and sucked in a breath of fresh air. “You’re a cocky son of a bitch, am I right?”

With a sarcastic laugh, Mike threatens to leave Chris with blue balls, to which Chris responds with whining and a jerk of his hips. Mike pats his leg to get him to settle back down so he could continue his work. With one hand on Chris’ stomach and the other circling Chris’ dick, Mike took Chris in once again. “Fuck, you’re really good at this for a straight guy.”

Mike hummed, sending vibrations throughout the other’s entire body. Mike had half of a mind to tell Chris that being with someone like Emily meant that he was almost always ‘sexing up’ the closest person. Male or female. Although he had to admit, between all the partners he had managed to sleep with over the few years he had been sexually active, Chris had been the most responsive. Probably because he’s a virgin, he thought. Or it's been a while. Either way, Chris was coming undone faster than shoelaces when one's feet ache.

He felt the hand in his hair tighten and he glanced up to see Chris chewing on his bottom lip and furrowing his brows. He sped up his pace and began tugging faster with his hand. “Almost there,” Chris breathed out, his toes curling up as he approached his breaking point. 

With a few more bobs and a single swipe of the tongue, Chris attempted to pull Mike off of him, to no avail. 

Mike kept himself in place, ignoring the painful tug in his hair, and letting Chris cum in his mouth. He sat up and reached over the side of his bed. He picked up his trash can and spit into it. He set the bin back down and placed his hand on Chris’ cheek.  
Surging forward, he kissed the other boy. Chris instantly opened his mouth, letting Mike’s tongue invade his mouth. They broke apart and Chris smiled coyly. “Damn dude. Can I return the favor?”

Mike pressed his lips to Chris’ cheek. “Nah, I’m good.” He lay next to Chris, folding his arms behind his head.

“You’re good?”

“Yup.”

Chris sat up on his side. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means,” Mike cleared his throat and gestured towards his crotch. “I’m good.”

Chris burst into laughter. “Ha! You totally came in your pants like a teenager!”

Mike punched Chris in the arm. “Oh shut it. It’s not my fault you fucking moan like a porn star.”

Chris lay back down on his back, still laughing. With a roll of his eyes, Mike draped a blanket over the bed, covering their bottom halves. “Well fortunately, I can promise you that I definitely don’t party like one.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter should be out in a week or two. It'll be easier to write, so don't expect a huge delay.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter. I'm not crying. Shut up. Sorry to make you wait this long. I didn't want to rush this. It's not my best work - HA! Like I can ever do 'my best work' - but I'm happy enough with it. I know it's short. But I think it needed to be short. Please enjoy. And thank you to those of you have read this whole thing. Thank you for all the encouragement. 
> 
> And I hope that you join me for any one of my other soon to be written Until Dawn stories.

He doesn’t expect dinner with the Monroe family to go so smoothly. Mostly because when they were done semi-romping in Mike’s bed they came down to be greeted by both of his parents – who had apparently watched three episodes of Seinfeld since they got home. Chris doesn’t think he could get any redder. 

Picking at his lasagna – he hates lasagna – he answers Mrs. Monroe’s questions aimed at both him and Mike. Michael seems rather nervous, apparently not having come out to his parents, and rather grateful that Chris is willing to take the wheel. Soon enough the conversation leads Chris to a point where’s holding Mike’s hand under the table. “Well we should set up a dinner with your parents Christopher.”

He thinks that maybe he should remind her that it’s just Chris, but instead he nods and smiles in agreement. “I’m sure they’d like that.”

 

Mike walks him to the door, peering around to make sure his parents aren’t watching, and kisses Chris. It doesn’t last long and when he pulls away he knows that they were both smiling goofily throughout the whole thing. “So I guess I reeled in your fine ass.”

“Moment. Ruined.” Chris laughs at his own joke and reaches up to grab Mike’s inner elbows. “Thank you.”

The other smirks. “What can I say, I’m pretty good with the little guy. Well, he’s not little, but you get my-,”

“I’m serious.” Chris squeezes Mike’s arms and the other closes his mouth to listen. “After everything that happened I knew that nothing would ever be the same. I loved him Mike, he was my everything. And he betrayed me. He betrayed all of us. And I’m so sorry about what happened to Jessica. If I had known that Josh was going to lose it I would’ve stopped him. I would’ve done something.”

“I know.”

“And I don’t want this to be a ‘let’s have sex and make-out because we need to’ thing. I want you to want this. And I want me to want this.”

“Do you?”

“I think so.” His hands travel up Mike’s arms to clasp themselves together behind the taller man’s neck. “God I feel like we’ve had this conversation before.”

“I think we have.”

“Glad to know we’re both so decisive.” Mike snorts. 

“You’re really great Chris. You know that right? Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.”

Chris removes his hands to place them on his hips. “Why would anyone tell me otherwise?” He pauses. “Bitch.”

Mike raises his brows. “Oh really now?”

“Yup.”

“So clearly now I’m gonna have to kick your ass.”

“Fight me.”

 

He doesn’t tell his parents that night. He vows to do so in the morning. They’d figure out sooner or later anyways. He watches Mike drive off once he’s up in his room. He really needs to get his own car.

Sam picks up the phone almost instantly. “How’d it go?”

“We had, like, sorta sex?”

“That’s better than not sex.” She points out. “Are you okay?”

Chris sighs. “Are any of us okay?”

“No.” She says honestly. He knows that Sam’s been having just as a hard time as the rest of them, maybe even worse. She had been both the twins’ friend and Josh’s. Josh had confided her. She often texted Chris something along the line of ‘ _I should’ve seen it._ ’ or ‘ _He said he wanted to get back at them._ ’ “But we do what he can. If you two love each other, if you two want to be together, don’t let this slip from your fingers Chris.

“He knows what you’re going through and you know what he’s going through. You’ve got the best of both worlds. Plus you guys will make cute babies.”

Chris rolls his eyes. She reminded him of Mike just then. Serious, then sarcastic. Chris doesn’t stop to consider that she was acting just like Josh as well. “You do know how human anatomy works right? Two men cannot have children…biologically.”

“I’ll be your surrogate mother.”

“Can I get that in writing?”

“I’m writing the letter right now.”

They hang up with Sam screaming into the receiver that Chris needs to get Mike on board with the whole ‘baby’ thing and Chris yelling back that they haven’t even been a thing for a week and she needs to cool it with all the talk of the future.

He texts Mike before he goes to bed.

_Sam thinks we’d have cute babies._

**yeah, she just txtd me. i disagree. i think i’d have cute babies. you, not so much.**

_You’re a dick._

**u love it.**

_Hey Mike?_

**yes my sweet cheeks?**

_One, don’t call me that – EVER – and two, at what point in my life did dating the douchey-ist guy in the room become ‘normal’?_

**subtle. i like it. and probs around the same time that u were born. just sayin.**

_Point taken._

**gtg, dad's calling. night, don’t let the bed bugs bite.**

 

He texts him back sometime around two in the morning.  
_I can’t stop crying. Come over?_

**omw. sit tight. love u.**

**kinda**

_Kinda love you too._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I slacked at the end, but oh well. I felt the need to do text messages between the babes. It felt right. Anyways. Thank you for joining me on this shitty-ly written story. *fist pumps into air, freeze frame, fade to black*


End file.
